I had one of those tempest-tossed nights awhile back. Some issues weighed heavily on my mind as well as an intermittent struggle with various fears and doubts. And there was a loud party three cabins down the road. I thought that I would sleep like a baby this night because I had little sleep the night before; but, alas, no. I dread these nights.
The minutes ticked by as if they were hours. I longed for the chirping birds, not the chirping crickets or robust revelers. Also, various noises in the night heightened my stress. I prayed for Jesus’ countenance that enabled him to sleep in the storm driven ship. But, I could not apprehend it. As soon as my mind settled down, a new squall would arise. I could not find peace nor slumber.
In a desperate measure for relief, I renounced all the ideas that brought me to this place. I decided that I would stay where I was, and I would run to my refuge: the ocean, and mingle my tears with this great body of salt water. As I envisioned myself so doing, I likened my salted tears with the brine, and the idea that the ocean is a teardrop of God’s came to my mind. I imagined this great body of salty water was His teardrop. Not the culmination of all His tears, not the cistern of sorrow from the sufferings of centuries, although that’s an interesting thought, too. But the ocean as a single divine teardrop.
His teardrop. One single teardrop put the perspective of God’s greatness in new light. I know the heavens are unfathomable, even contemplating the immensity of the sea overwhelms me, but just trying to understand the ocean as a single divine teardrop is almost a tangible thought even though I know he is greater than that. As I thought that in the midst of my stormy night, I wanted to write the idea down, but there was no pen or paper nearby, so I fumbled with my phone and emailed the thought to myself.
Eventually I fell asleep and faced the next day. However the issues work out, I know I know a great God, one who has my tear drops bottled up, and when I look at this vast body of water I live next to I will remember that night, that night of struggle, that night of illumination when I caught a glimpse of His greatness.